My book The Shyness Guide basically does three things: It presents the evidence that shyness is natural It tries to convince you to accept yourself as a shy person It shows how you can function in the social world in a shy way, rather than in the outgoing way that is constantly urged on you. … Continue reading Shyness |Accept yourself, but don’t expect them to accept you
When there are more than 600 books about shyness for sale on Amazon, you might wonder why I wrote another one. How could there be anything left to say? Well, because shyness is almost never understood the way I understand it. My central idea is that shyness is natural in most shy people. It's part … Continue reading Why did I write The Shyness Guide?
In my novels The Birdcatcher and Skol, and in The Shyness Guide, I’ve said that I think shyness and autism are both usually natural. I've also suggested that, in some people, they may be related to each other. This perception of them isn’t supported by any research as far as I know. But when I … Continue reading Shyness & Autism – Are they related?
Nothing seems to bother non-shy people more than the reluctance of shy people to talk. "What's the matter with you?!! Speak up! Be assertive! Stop hiding from us!" - that's their common refrain, especially in workplaces, at school, etc. Why are social people like that? I think it's starts with their instinctual need for communication. … Continue reading Shy Silence
Well, I say we're falling into an abyss because decades ago most of us went over the cliff edge of understanding when we accepted introvert/extrovert as fundamental to human personality. The way introvert/extrovert is understood today is very different from what psychologist C.G.Jung intended when he introduced those terms into psychology a century ago. He … Continue reading Introverts and Extroverts into the abyss
In The Shyness Guide I've said that you can become less shy by being more shy. Most people don't understand this. What I mean is that, instead of trying to suppress your shyness, the best thing to do is to accept it – accept who you are. That doesn't mean giving up and hiding at … Continue reading Being less shy by being more shy
Because the Kindle ebook is going to be delayed, I have made up a 77 page PDF (from the 289 pages of the new book) that you can download free. This is not an abridgement, but it is much more than the usual sampling you get on books for sale. Read it and you'll come … Continue reading The Shyness Guide – free PDF excerpt