Nothing about shyness bothers non-shy people more than the reluctance of shy people to talk. "What's the matter with you? Speak up! Be assertive! Stop hiding from us!" - that's their common refrain in workplaces, at school, etc. Why are social people like that? I think it starts with their instinctual need for communication. Never … Continue reading Rescuing Shyness | Resist the hostility of the social world
Loners |The one place where society welcomes them |Anneli Rufus and her book Party of One
Loners have a hard time in the modern, day-to-day world, yet not in fiction and film. Solitary men - who I think are shy and/or autistic men - are heroes in literature and the movies – James Fenimore Cooper's Natty Bumpo in The Deerslayer and The Last of the Mohicans. David Copperfield in the Dickens … Continue reading Loners |The one place where society welcomes them |Anneli Rufus and her book Party of One
Autism and Love-Shyness | A message to the Incels
Yes, this is a message to the Incels from my younger self. When I published the recent post, Toronto Van Rampage III | Alek Minassian and the Incels, I didn't explain that when I was 17 yrs old I was well on my way to being one of them. Based on psychologist Brian Gilmartin's research … Continue reading Autism and Love-Shyness | A message to the Incels
Autism’s lost loners | James Michener
Because the deceased author James Michener will be a major character in my next novel, now wandering the world alone as a ghost, I've been thinking a lot about him. I realized today that he is another candidate for these lists of people who might belong on the spectrum. For he was a loner among … Continue reading Autism’s lost loners | James Michener
Autism’s lost loners|the boy who bought the Earth
Somewhere I’ve said that I think most loners are on the ASD spectrum. Enough has been written about famous loners who, in ‘real life’, have or probably have or had Asperger’s syndrome/ASD - Bill Gates, Michael Jackson, Vladimir Putin, Abraham Lincoln, etc, etc - in this series, I’m going to look at forgotten ones, … Continue reading Autism’s lost loners|the boy who bought the Earth
Psychologist Philip Zimbardo’s warning about Incels and/or Shy Loners
Writing since the 1970s, Philip Zimbardo is one of the few psychologists who has devoted much of his career to shyness. In a Mar 31, 2016 post in Psychology Today, "The New Shyness -How virtual reality has made social Isolation more seductive than ever before", Zimbardo provided a very interesting update. He says shyness is … Continue reading Psychologist Philip Zimbardo’s warning about Incels and/or Shy Loners
Rescuing Shyness|Why being a loner may be good for your health
The above refers to a Feb 28/2018 “Best of BBC Future” post by Christine Ro. After acknowledging that there has been a lot of research into the negative psychological effects of 'social isolation' (for example, the Royal College of General Practicioners in the UK say that research has found loneliness to have a risk level … Continue reading Rescuing Shyness|Why being a loner may be good for your health
Rescuing History | Reading ‘The People v. Lee Harvey Oswald’
More about the most famous, or infamous, loner of the twentieth century. This week I finally finished reading the 651 pages of The People v. Lee Harvey Oswald, by Walt Brown. A one-time FBI agent who went back to school to become a history professor, Brown says that since he was a boy he what … Continue reading Rescuing History | Reading ‘The People v. Lee Harvey Oswald’
Autism | When they admire you
For some years now I've been editing my old journals, condensing them, getting rid of the paper. This morning I came upon the entry for Sept 12, 1969, one of the most important dates in my life. In an upscale bar frequented by the insurance industry, I had met Matthew, a young underwriter who I … Continue reading Autism | When they admire you