When I was a boy, I was intensely shy, more avoidant than anyone else I met then in any of the schools I attended. No one in the working-class neighborhood of the North-American steel town where I grew up had heard of 'autism', but my behavior fit autism pretty well. If I got myself assessed … Continue reading Shyness vs Everything else |the problem with diagnoses
The above refers to a Feb 28/2018 “Best of BBC Future” post by Christine Ro. After acknowledging that there has been a lot of research into the negative psychological effects of 'social isolation' (for example, the Royal College of General Practicioners in the UK say that research has found loneliness to have a risk level … Continue reading Rescuing Shyness|Why being a loner may be good for your health
The following is a slightly revised version of a discussion in my book, The Shyness Guide, of the enigmatic question - “What is Shyness”. Psychologist Philip Zimbardo, founder of the Stanford Shyness Institute in California, has devoted much of his life to shyness. In his 1978 book, Shyness - What It is, What to Do … Continue reading The Wildness in Shyness
In my book The Shyness Guide, I've written about C.G. Jung's different conception of 'introvert/extrovert' - different, that is, from the view of most people today. In his 1921 book Psychological Types, he proposed that there are four principal functions: Two perceiving functions: Sensation and Intuition Two judging functions: Thinking and Feeling We … Continue reading Are you an introvert and an extrovert?
Are you aware that shyness seems to be increasing? Besides the fact that surveys, at least in North America, have for some time revealed the number of people who perceive themselves to be shy increasing (usually over 50% now), in sociologist Eric Klinenberg's 2012 bestselling book, Going Solo - The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of … Continue reading Shyness Re-emerging
If I could have written only one book in my life, it would have been Skol. Yet the first version of the book, published in 2015, did not sell at all. Yes, this story of the future of shy people, told through one shy young man's odyssey across three centuries, remained the most unread of … Continue reading Skol republished|A return to the 23rd century and the future of shy people
In my book The Shyness Guide I discuss psychologist Elaine Aron's concept of the "highly sensitive person". She came to the conclusion that that her HSP diagnosis was necessary because of the profound difference in the sensitivity of people. There is a sensitive/insensitive divide in us. Dr Aaron would caution me to say – ‘more … Continue reading Where did insensitive people come from?
When Clive Staples Lewis (author of The Chronicles of Narnia, etc) was a boy and was sent away to a public boarding school, he was miserable because he was acutely shy. Eventually realizing that Clive was too shy for such a place, his father took him out and sent him to live in the country … Continue reading Rescuing Shyness|C. S. Lewis
My book The Shyness Guide basically does three things: It presents the evidence that shyness is natural It tries to convince you to accept yourself as a shy person It shows how you can function in the social world in a shy way, rather than in the outgoing way that is constantly urged on you. … Continue reading Shyness |Accept yourself, but don’t expect them to accept you